Perk # 57: Cancer Made Me Value Every Birthday
28 Jan 2012 10 Comments
in positive attitude cancer Tags: birthday, breast cancer blog, positive attitude
Well, here I am, 45 years old today. Where does the time go? Seems like only yesterday I was 44. One thing cancer has done for me is make me really appreciate my birthdays! Never again will I complain about getting older, and these lines and wrinkles…..I’ve earned every one of them. While many women dread the big “Five-OH” I am sure it will be the happiest birthday of my life. I will finally be able to say that I am cancer free.
Tip: Treasure every birthday, every day, and every breath.
Perk # 56: Cancer Cured Me Of My Needle/Blood Phobia
27 Jan 2012 15 Comments
in humor cancer Tags: breast cancer blog, breast cancer humor, mastectomy
Flo, Three days post-mastectomy
When it comes to medical procedures, I have always been a bit of a wimp. In my early school days, I was renowned for my reaction to the public health nurse on “needle day”. With a sense of shame, I recall actually biting a nurse and kicking a nun in the leg to escape my grade one vaccination (Sorry Nurse Pinksen and Sister Mary Kelly). While I no longer get physically violent with medical personnel (well, hardly ever), I have been known to get weak at the sight of blood and needles. As you can imagine, this has proven to be quite an inconvenience during my cancer treatments. I am happy to report however, that after being poked and prodded in places where no needle should ever venture, I have toughened up quite a bit, and can now profess that I am completely cured of my needle/blood phobia!
The true test of my new found toughness came with my recent mastectomy. I had conjured up images of how it would be when I saw my new physique for the first time. You know how it happens in the movies: the woman gently caresses her flat chest, her lip quivers, and silent tears flow down her face while violin music plays softly in the background. My experience was a little different. My cousin/nurse, Lil was sitting in the room with me when I popped my head up and looked down at my green gown to check out my flat chest for the first time. “Geeze”, I said, “He went and took off the two of ‘em !” As it turns out, “rightie” had just slipped under my armpit, as is often the habit of saggy, middle aged breasts, but she was still fully intact. Lil and I had a great giggle at my discovery. I wasn’t sure if I was up to looking at the actual cut, but Lil is one of those old-school nurses, and she gave me little choice in the matter. As she cleaned the incision, we counted the staples together. One, two, three……twenty-nine. “I guess I could round it up to thrity”, I said to Lil. “Or you could be like a man and exaggerate it up to sixty,” she replied. We howled with laughter!
Tip: If you can face cancer head on, nothing will ever have the power to scare you!
P.S. A big thank you to Dr. Mathieson and his fabulous team!
PERK BREAK
23 Jan 2012 31 Comments
in breast cancer Tags: attitude, breast cancer blog
The Only Difference Between A Good Day And A Bad Day Is Your Attitude.
Hello Friends! Just a note to let you know that I will be taking a break from reporting the “perks of having cancer” for awhile. At 9:00 a.m tomorrow, January 24th, I will be bidding farewell to my left breast and associated lymph nodes, just four days before my 45th birthday. There’s nothing perky about that! (The breast I mean, it hasn’t been perky since my early thirties). I am sure that during my recovery I will discover lots more perks of having cancer, so stay tuned.
I ask you to keep me, and my loved ones in your prayers as I undergo the next phase of my cancer treatments. God Bless.
Perk # 55: Cancer Made Me Re-Evaluate The Relationships In My Life
21 Jan 2012 7 Comments
in perks of cancer Tags: breast cancer blog, breast cancer inspiration, friends
“Being diagnosed with breast cancer and being given the opportunity to survive provides each of us with the chance to step back and assess how we are spending our time and begin to look more closely as to whether what we are doing is really contributing to this world in a positive way.
We are in touch with our mortality ahead of schedule and begin to realize that life is more precious than we recognized or conceived and needs to be valued and not taken for granted. Relationships take on a different tone, some perhaps ending and others becoming more meaningful.”
-Lillie Shockney
Darn! I wish I had said that. Although these are not my words, they certainly resonate very strongly with me. People expect that when you get cancer you suddenly get great insights in to life. Well, they are right. When I am asked about my great insights, I have only one: The only thing that really matters in life is people. You already knew that, right? Yeah, so did I, intellectually. But knowing it, and really believing it are two different things. And cancer has the perk of allowing you to really believe and feel the truth of that statement.
Like Lilly Shockney, cancer made me re-evaluate the relationships in my life. I ended some, and gave more of my energy to others. On that note, I would like to pay tribute to my wonderful friends, those people who are truly deserving of my time and energy. I have been blessed from a very young age with meaningful friendships. Lily, Winnie, and Denise saw me through my childhood and teen years. While our lives have gone in different directions, there is a bond between us that time can never break. Then there are the friends who were with me for a season of my life, Sandy, Carol Anne (with an “e”) and Anita, just to name a few. Finally, there are my soldiers. These friends have been in the trenches with me for more than a decade, and when the going gets tough, it is these phenomenal women that I first turn to. They have cried with me, laughed with me, and drank wine with me through divorce, new relationships, break ups, Ben’s diagnosis of autism, and now the Big C. I can depend on them for anything. I thank God for this wonderful gift of friendship, and I thank these friends for sharing my life, the good, the bad and the ugly. I love you guys!
Madonna, Jackie, Sherry and Me (in short hair wig)
Natalie, Me and Veronica (when I still had hair)
Tip: When you are battling cancer, your time and energy become more precious to you. Don’t waste it on toxic relationships, instead nurture those relationships which allow you to be your best self.
Perk # 54: Riding Shotgun
19 Jan 2012 4 Comments
in perks of cancer Tags: breast cancer blog, breast cancer humor, breast cancer inspiration, riding shotgun
Before I go driving anywhere with my teens, I am sure to hear one of them yell, “Shotgun!” This statement gives the person saying it the privilege of sitting in the front seat of the vehicle. I assume the expression originated in the days of the covered wagon, when the person sitting next to the driver carried a gun for protection, and therefore was known to be riding shotgun.
Since getting cancer, I don’t even have to call “shotgun”. No matter how many people are packed into a vehicle, I automatically get the coveted spot. Even Mom, with her bad knee, will climb into the back of a two door vehicle so that I can ride shotgun. It may be a small perk of having cancer, but it is a perk all the same.
Tip: Perks such as riding shotgun may be a small bonus when you have cancer, but each of these conveniences makes life a little easier, so take advantage of them while you can.
Perk # 53: Perks For Parents
17 Jan 2012 9 Comments
in perks of cancer Tags: breast cancer blog, breast cancer inspiration, parents, perks of cancer
My parents, Len and Madeline
I recently received a very moving message from a woman named Kelly, who said, “Our world came crashing down just after Christmas when our mom, our best friend, the woman who holds everything together, called and told us she was diagnosed with breast cancer.” (See the full message on About Me page.) This statement brought home to me the reality that cancer truly is a family disease. When I was diagnosed, my whole family was grief stricken, none more than my parents. However, just as cancer had its perks for me, it turns out that my cancer held some perks for them as well.
Dad has lived most of his life with chronic back pain, among other health issues. For many years he existed in the sick role, with Mom and his five daughters caring for him. After I was diagnosed, there was a big change in Dad. All of a sudden he started showing up at my house with his little tool kit asking if I needed anything fixed (that is a man’s way of nurturing, by the way). While I was undergoing chemo, my sister Sherry experienced serious health issues as well, requiring emergency surgery. While Mom was at my home taking care of me, Dad was at Sherry’s nursing her back to health. What a role reversal!
A few weeks ago, at the age of 68, Dad got his first passport. Mom has been traveling to Florida for years to visit my sister, but she long ago gave up hope of ever getting Dad to go with her. It took everyone by surprise when he agreed to go, and I have to say, despite the discomfort he experienced during our travels, he was a real trooper. Dad still lives with chronic pain, but this experience seems to have given him a new lease on life.
Another perk is the deeper closeness that seems to have developed between my parents. Pulling together in a time of crisis has taken them to a new level of intimacy. This is apparent not only to our family, but to others as well. On the flight back from Florida, as my parents were chatting and laughing, the flight attendant asked them if they were on their honeymoon. Mom, a practical, no nonsense person, laughed heartily at that comment. For her, it was a real knee slapper! I think Dad took it as a compliment.
Tip: It is sometimes difficult to allow ourselves to be nursed and nurtured by others. Keep in mind however that this blessing is a gift as much for the giver as the receiver.
Perk # 52: Rockin’ The Bandana
15 Jan 2012 3 Comments
in perks of cancer Tags: bandana, breast cancer blog, breast cancer inspiration
Rockin' the bandana with my sister, Lynette.
Until recently I thought that the right to wear hats and other head wear belonged to British royalty and certain ethnic groups. With the exception of my woollen toque, hats made me feel “pretentious”, like I was trying to pull off a Kate Middleton. Since losing my hair however, I have discovered a whole new line of accessories: hats, wigs, turbans, scarves, and my personal favourite, bandanas. I can coordinate my headdress to match any outfit, without feeling the least bit pretentious. In fact, I feel so confident with my new style that I will continue to rock the bandana even after my hair returns.
Tip: If you lose your hair due to chemo, try experimenting with different styles and varieties of head wear. You don’t have to sacrifice comfort for style.
Perk # 51: Cancer Motivated Me To Eat Healthier
13 Jan 2012 7 Comments
in humor cancer Tags: breast cancer humour, healthy eating, new year's resolution
Well, here we are in the middle of January, the time to make or break those New Year’s resolutions. I am happy to report that I am making EXCELLENT progress with my resolution to live a healthier lifestyle. I am a complete pillar of willpower! Well, I actually only started today because I just got back from my Florida vacation, but all the same, it is nearly 9:00 and I have not consumed one piece of junk food.
Before getting cancer, I wasn’t really motivated to eat healthy. I ate “healthy-ish” but indulged in junky foods and beverages whenever I felt like it. Most people eat a healthy diet in order to control their weight, but the truth is, I am just not prone to weight gain. Like my Aunt Marlene, I can pretty much eat whatever I want, whenever I want, and still wear the same size jeans I did in grade 7. Hey, don’t hate me because I am thin! However, now that I am in cancer fighting mode, I realize that I will have to trade in my diet cokes for green teas, and my cheesy Doritos for carrot sticks.
In keeping with my resolution, I started the day with a trip to the supermarket to stock up on nutritious foods. I am obviously not the only person going in to 2012 with a promise to eat healthier. I snickered to myself at my fellow shoppers pushing carts laden with fruits and veggies, while hungrily eyeing bins of marked down Christmas goodies. I noticed one woman greedily fondling a half price gingerbread house, then throwing it back in the bin and making a hasty retreat with her cart full of green beans and broccoli. I felt quite proud of myself as I checked in my groceries: sweet potatoes, zucchini, celery, tofu, and even a bag of lentils. I do have a question, though: what the heck are lentils anyway and what am I supposed to do with them?
Tip: You are what you eat! Start your day with a healthy fruit smoothie. Just blend one cup of frozen mixed berries, a half a cup of low fat yogurt, one tablespoon of ground flax seed, and half a cup of cranberry juice (or other fruit juice). Cheers!
Perk # 50: The Use Of Medicinal Marijuana
10 Jan 2012 6 Comments
in humor cancer Tags: breast cancer, medicinal marijuana
Bong Shop in Key West, FL.
Let me make one thing clear, I am not the type to scrimp on drugs. When it comes to natural childbirth, for example, I am completely against it. If there is a drug out there to ease pain and suffering of any kind, you can give it to me (I’m talking legit, prescribed meds of course). After all, that is why God created pharmaceuticals.
When I was diagnosed with cancer, one of my biggest concerns was about the side effects of chemo. I was fine with losing my hair, but just the thought of being sick, made me sick. I was so relieved when my Oncologist explained to me the variety of drugs available to cancer patients: steroids, diuretics, and anti-nausea pills, to name a few. If all else failed, she could even prescribe medicinal marijuana!
Suddenly, I had visions of myself in a long, flowing skirt, my arms weighed down with bangles, puffing contentedly on a joint as I listened to Bob Marley tunes. I even briefly considered getting the peace symbol tattooed to my ankle. However, my daughter Kaitlyn put an abrupt end to my fantasies when she said, “Mom, don’t even think about trying to be one of those COOL cancer patients, you can’t pull it off.” And so, my friends, I am sad to say that while the use of medicinal marijuana is a perk of having cancer, for me it was a missed perk. Although I do think I AM cool enough to pull it off!
Tip: Cancer treatments can have some nasty side effects, but there is no need to suffer in silence. Explore with your doctor the many options available to ease unpleasant symptoms and side effects.
Perk # 49: A Free Trip To Florida
04 Jan 2012 11 Comments
in perks of cancer Tags: breast cancer inspiration, cancer treatments, Florida, mastectomy
I am posting this perk from sunny Florida, compliments of my sister, Lynette and her generous husband, Jeff. This surprise vacation could not have come at a better time. It allows me to recoup after my chemo treatments, and prepare me both mentally and physically for my up-coming mastectomy. While my colleagues in Canada are trudging to work through several feet of snow, I am lounging by the pool, soaking up the rays, with a warm breeze blowing through my stubble. That is one of the perkiest perks of having cancer!
Tip: There is nothing like a good dose of sunshine to lift your spirits when you are undergoing cancer treatments. If you are not able to fly off to a sunny destination, make like a cat and curl up in a sunny location in your house.
